Captain is the facility manager in charge of alarm oversight and troubleshooting. Currently in dispute about alarm techniques, he and his subordinates favor different approaches. Captain would like to see a one-very-large-sound approach, where the people on his team prefer a constant never ending beeping. As a company, we have accepted that this will most likely never change.
Captain is terrified of the Goodwill logo. He is currently going through therapy, since this could be viewed as a security vulnerability.